Yesterday I weighed in again. For last week I lost 2.6 lbs. which brings my total weight loss to...(drum roll please)...33.4 lbs!! I have to say that the last couple of weeks I wasn't that happy with my weight loss. Not because I wasn't losing enough, but because I felt like I was losing too much too fast. I kind of mourned looking in the mirror and seeing a different skinnier face. (I think I must have carried ALOT of weight in my face!) It's the face I remember from years ago, but it's not yet a familiar face. (Okay that sounds stupid but just bear with me on this stupidly whiny post!)
I had just been kind of depressed with the weight loss and I'm not exactly sure why, but talking with my sister-in-law/therapist (she's not really a therapist but she was last night for me) I think I can chalk it up to a few things:
1. I feel guilty for being able to lose so much weight so quickly when I know that other people struggle to lose a few pounds.
2. My clothes don't fit me anymore! It really sucks when I have to throw out my whole wardrobe (even though, it wasn't that great to begin with, it was still MY clothes)
3. I think that in a way my fat was a comfort to me. Does that make sense? I'm not sure if it does, but I heard it on Oprah, so it has to be valid. Seriously, being able to eat whatever I wanted made me feel good, at least temporarily. I only disliked what it did to my body in the long run.
My dad would say to all this in his sarcastic voice: Booohooohoohoo! And I think I agree :)
So last night I was watching Oprah (sorry, I'm an unashamed Oprah fan) and they had on overweight teenagers and had given them a whole bunch of health tests to see what their extra weight was doing to their bodies. It was truly sad to see how badly their bodies were working. That's when I got my new motivation for losing weight. I am now losing weight so that I can be healthy. Kaleb said last night that I had lost the equivalent of Lucy's total body weight and could I imagine carrying her around all the time? I can't and, you know what, I'm not going to do that any more to this poor body of mine. It's time to get healthy!
(How'd you like that corny ending?)
3 comments:
Jennifer,
I love that you post the truth. Sometimes that's just how things are or just how we feel. Have you read the book, "Running with Angels" I don't remember the author but they sell it at Deseret Book, We read it for our book club and I liked it. Monica
YOU are AMAZING! You really do Look Fantastic and I am so proud of you. Way to go! I am on the boat and I feel so much better about myself when I am trying to be healthy. But seriously, you look really good and even better you are healthy!
PS I am no longer one of the bloggers that dropped off the face of the earth because I finally posted!
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